So. Putting aside for a moment the current drama, family and big decisions and all that… I just wanted to take a few minutes to tell you that I am so glad you were here last week. Whatever else may happen, or not happen, the time we spent together was really wonderful, and I feel so lucky to have shared all of that with you.
I am sorry that I cried last night when we were talking. I know that the current state of affairs is hard for you and the last thing I want is to make it harder in any way. It is just so frustrating to see you so upset and be unable to hold you and kiss you, growl and nibble you to make you smile, let you rub my belly for stress relief. ^_^
And I have to admit that the idea that our time together could be limited to a handful of all-too-brief visits is rather painful. You are wearing my collar, and the feral part of me says that you are mine and you belong with me. You are wearing my collar and I should be there to pull on it and make you melt into my arms. But aside from that, god, there are too many things we need to do together, too many things I want to experience with you, and the thought that we may not get to do them truly saddens me. But mostly, I just like the idea of being with you, spending more time with you, kissing you and touching you and looking into your beautiful eyes, seeing your lovely smile in all its many permutations. Maybe I’m a romantic fool or something, but I just feel so strongly that we should spend more time together, making each other laugh, making each other come, sharing experiences and explorations and all of that good stuff. And like you said to me, I want to see you happy, and I want to share that happiness with you. And I think you might be perfect or at least perfect for me, and I am addicted to kissing you.
But I’ve gotten off track. I really just wanted to say that I feel incredibly lucky that you asked me to be your first and I am so glad you came to PA. I am so glad that we spent that time together, so very glad that I have been able to know you and love you and be loved by you. And I want to thank you for all of it, and for trusting me, for being completely fabulous and giving and open. You’re the shiz, Petey Pie. Srsly. I’m so happy for the time we had together and here’s hoping there will be a hell of a lot more of it to come.