The evening of my last post, I went to my dad’s house to borrow a pot and ended up crying on his shoulder.  And made the decision to end the relationship as it stands with MJ.  Finally said out loud that she is never going to be the caring, giving partner that I need. 

I haven’t mentioned any of it to her yet.  There are things to figure out first, namely where the hell I’m going to live and how I’m going to pay for it.  The idea of breaking up with her and having to still live and sleep together for however long it takes to find a new place and/or roommate…  no way. 

It has become very clear to me why it’s advisable to wait until you realllly know a partner to move in with them.  It’s so hard to end things, or even just take a break, when our lives are so entangled.

This development is a good thing though.  Now the key is not to drag it out so long that I lose my resolve.

 

In other news, I almost definitely have a new job.  I’m just waiting to hear back about pay (I asked for more than they initially offered - hooray for being assertive!), and details on when I’ll be starting. 

Oh, and I did talk to Xel, and he is coming down next weekend.  Go figure.